Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice has made almost $600 million worldwide. That’s a lot for a movie every bit as atrocious as you’ve heard. Batman v. Superman is so extraordinarily muddled and boring that the few critics who are determined to like something about it are driven to desperation.

Andrew O’Hehir of Salon, for example, is wowed by “textures”: “If this film is about anything (which is debatable), it’s about materials and fabrics . . . ”

In my suffering, I didn’t think of the fabrics that might have sustained me. I was focusing on “politics.”