Six years after “Megxit,” Prince Harry and Meghan Markle are reversing course — at least partially. The Duke and Duchess of Sussex will reportedly return to Britain later this month for an extended stay, settling with their children Archie and Lilibet in a private residence outside London while the children attend British schools. They will retain their mansion in Montecito as well as a holiday home in Portugal, and remain nonworking royals, which sounds like a contradiction, but alas. No official explanation has been offered for this spectacular U-turn, but perhaps the prodigal son eventually tires of eating among the swine, or, in Harry’s case, of producing polo documentaries that no one watches.

Regardless, let me say on behalf of the rest of America: Goodbye and good riddance. We thankfully still have little use for royals, as the No Kings rallies have proved about our gold-plated pretend emperor holding court in the White House. Plus, there’s very little to miss. Harry’s retreat to the UK is not exactly Odysseus returning to Ithaca, older and wiser, ready to reclaim his place on the throne. He didn’t battle witches or outwit gods or even, really, suffer in California in any way ordinary people would recognize as suffering. The fallen prince has only a diminished Netflix deal and several hours of unlistenable audio, and the only army that conclusively routed him was Spotify’s podcast division.

And Montecito is far from war-torn Troy; it’s California’s wine-dipped coastal retreat for the rich and famous, which The New York Times has described as “pale, pricey, gently geriatric” (translation: white, rich, and old). There, in 2020, Harry and Meghan purchased a sprawling $14 million mansion (now valued at $29 million) that made their historic Frogmore Cottage in England look like a royal-themed Airbnb.